Has someone ever caused you to lose your patience?  Have you ever said something you regretted? Has anger taken root in your heart and bitterness grown to choke out the joy, peace,  and love you once had?  Have you found yourself saying hateful and mean things?  Do you gossip or blame others?   If so, then it’s time to do some tilling in the soil of your heart!

My two boys loved playing baseball in the backyard.  They were committed to the game come rain or shine.  Daily games of baseball in the backyard were not the issue.  Rain and mud are healthy for the body and spirit of a child (and for that matter, adults, too).  But, on this one hot, muggy, mosquito thick day in Georgia, I took issue with the game when one of their baseballs came flying through the picture window in the front room of our home.  It was the fifth broken window by a baseball within two years.  And yes, there had been teaching of where to hit the ball, and consequences for previous actions.  But this time, I carried into my reaction anger from a conversation that occurred just before the crash.  It was still lingering in my mind and heart.  This pushed me to the edge, and the boys experienced the wrath of Mama-zilla!  I was so enraged that I broke a wooden bat over my thigh.  I had no recollection of the act until it was brought to my attention.  I said nothing; my non-verbal communication was clear.  No bat, no baseball, no more broken windows!  But, truly, the heart issue was not the ball through the window.  It was the offense I carried into that moment, that was not related to either of the boys, which created the perfect storm!

It was not even five minutes before my heart melted, and I apologized for losing my temper with tears flowing.  They were quick to forgive, hug me, tell me they were sorry, and to say we would be okay.  This was such a beautiful moment of pure forgiveness on all our parts.  They recognized that their disobedience was not good and I had modeled humility with my apology.  My oldest son offered to talk to Mr. Donny, a friend from church, who had helped with past window breaks, to see if he could work off getting the glass to fix the window.  My younger son fixed dinner and cleaned up the kitchen.  That night the boys and I huddled together on the sofa with some buttery popcorn and watched a funny movie.  Laughter is good medicine for a broken soul.  The beauty in this story is that God’s mercy flowed because my repentance led to forgiveness and healing between us all!  The love of baseball continues in this family.

There are two kinds of anger:  righteous and unrighteous.  An unrighteous anger is a reactionary response to a deeply rooted growth in our heart that started from an offense.  It was watered with pride, and fertilized by unforgiveness.  The only solution is to rid yourself of it.  This comes through repentance, forgiveness, and changed behavior.  A righteous anger is the necessary emotional expression needed for healing.  For those of you who have experienced an offense against you such as abuse, or other kinds of injustice, I empathize with you.  I encourage you to allow the Holy Spirit to strengthen you and restore your brokenness.  I hope you will find the courage to lay down the anger in exchange for newness and recovery.

During the encounter with the bat and the nonverbal discipline, praise music I loved and listened to often was playing in the background.  These songs of praise were hidden in my heart.  The entire time that anger, pride, and unforgiveness were seeking to destroy, the music familiar to my heart was reminding me of what was true, and to sing His praises.  This was God’s mercy woven into the finite details of our lives.  I was the only one to blame for the ripples of pain I caused, but God delivered and healed!

The best place to start dealing with anger is with praise!  Why?  Because when our hearts begin to praise, the walls we have built around our hearts crumble.  Next, we need to surrender, or release that which has caused the walls and created the roots of anger and bitterness; we need to repent.  Third, there may be a need to reconcile with another if your actions have caused discord, or brought about shame toward another.  Our words and actions can tear apart anything good, leaving only room for foolishness and evil to kill, steal, and destroy.  The ripples of harboring anger are powerfully deep and can easily bring a tsunami into your life.  But there is hope!  Hope is found in true forgiveness!  Lip service without a heart change will only feed the roots of bitterness.  Forgetting is not always feasible, but the pain will wane over time if you have truly forgiven.  And finally, thank God for His mercy!

It is my prayer that you will put to death any offense in your life that has caused anger.  Surrender your pride; surrender the weight of your pain, forgive 70×7 times or as after as you need, and let God’s mercy weave life into your thirsty soul!

Joyfully Healing from the Inside Out,